In the Night Living Life

I was a soaring sun in azure before I ever felt the momentary grasp of a void or its unknown hazards
Now I’ve shown rivers long for departure black in fashion; drowning youth, invincibility and passion
The daggers of betrayal held by “I love you” and “forever after”, I laugh to keep from crying in the tragic
I laugh to keep from crying though my spirit is in atrophy, fated alongside the universe and its casket
A revery between sudden sadness and madness that’ll be forever held atop the precipice of a razor and dictated by the whims of cherubs

My scars are a reminder that life is short but very precious, nothing can imitate this not even plastic
And although I struggle daily with depression, living underneath this mass fears dark and static
I seek out light as a ship lost in an ocean with storms unending, constant rocking motion are shakes of devotion to panic
Folded hands and bent knees, but it all becomes meaningless in the deep, love language and curses course after
In this abyssal shadow of infatuation now settled, I’ve learned to embrace all abrasives with laughter

They’ll prick you expecting molten steel to drip out to further a template of the ideal, despite it deepening a disaster
They’ll plaster your face over every facade that sees the light of day with slander, to take solace in a peace that’s more phantasmal
You’ve become a sacrifice for lives that deny your very existence and visceral, the freedom of choice is the lure in a lullaby’s vehicle
Between the scythe and sickle as it counts down to meet you, “you were a wonderful person” that’ll insist without really knowing you
Flowery wreaths over the unspoken misery kept haphazardly hidden, you’ll forever be a hero despite never feeling completely cinematic

©2023 loose.leaf.lover